Dallas Crane

Usually, when reviewing a band, you would expect that the main objective would be to actually SEE the band in question. But due to circumstances beyond my control I somehow managed to miss a rather large portion of the Dallas Crane gig at the good old Plantation Hotel in Coffs Harbour - although I did hear people comment that it was an unusally short gig, so this remains questionable. All I can say is thank Christ they did an encore.

Despite the vortex I seemed to slip into halfway through the night, I can safely say that Airbourne completely stole the show (admittedly easy to say when you miss the main band) and fulfilled many of my 80's fantasies- these boys know how to wear black jeans and long hair, and they do it well. Originally expecting The Vandas to waltz out on stage (where the hell were they anyway??) I was slightly confused when the Airbourne lads walked out, but my confusion was very quickly blasted out of my body as the boys launched into good hard Aussie rock.

Quite possibly the love children of Bon Scott and Angry Anderson, Airbourne will get your ears ringing for the rest of the night and your heart thumping (although my friend reckons that could have been due to their bare chests dripping with sweat, oh okay, I do too - phwoar!) One thing is certain, when they cried "It's gonna be a hell of a show tonight" at the beginning of 'Stand and Deliver', they were not wrong. Having just recorded their debut album in LA, and about to embark on a US tour, there's no denying Airbourne have some major support behind them and with lyrics like "the wine is cheap and the women are even cheaper" is it any wonder?? Left slightly shell-shocked after their performance, I sort of felt like I had seen the entire gig for the night, which actually turned out to be half true.

So my fellow dwarfers we come to the part where your reviewer slips out between sets for a drink and ciggy, but somehow manages to disappear into a black hole of immense magnitude. I remember nothing of this time, except for helping a girl vomit her stomach lining into the toilet before handing her back to friends - possibly the wrong move, but I had a review to do damn it - and pleading with the doorman "I'm with The Dwarf! You have to let me back in!" when I realised the doors to the gig were locked. After giving me a "I don't give a flying f**k" look, he then yelled at me "Oh! You mean Dale? Sure no worries!" and let me and my mates through the doors. I later learned that Dale was a nice man of short stature travelling with the Carnival passing through Coffs that week. He was their accountant. Thank you Dale.

I had been psyching myself up for weeks to get down and dirty to 'Lovers and Sinners' - I live in a country town at the moment folks, I needed this! It did not happen. I did not sing along with the crowd to 'Tonight (There's a party goin down)'. I did watch in horror as Dave Larkin and the boys walked off stage. I did turn to my friends and begin to cry. No, not really but I think I would have if the Crane didn't rock back up on stage and play a few familiar tunes, including 'No Through Road' and 'Already Gone'. I was grateful for the nostalgia, and even more grateful that I got to hear at least one new song, 'Curiosity'. The crowd seemed to be eating it all up but I have to admit that the boys didn't seem to be fully charged on the night, but after a mass of gigs promoting their new album you have to cut the boys some slack somewhere. I can't wait for the chance to see them live again and in full glory. Until then, I will listen to Factory Girls over and over again, and daydream of the night I will finally get down and dirty with Dallas Crane.

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