Falls Festival - Marion Bay 2006-7

How can one condense three days of peace, love and music into under 1 000 words? I mean the movie of ‘Woodstock' in its original form was over five hours long and the cinema version clocked in at three. So if history proves to be the precedent (as it often does and I believe by definition that it should or at the very least have a fair crack at it) then describing the experience in toto would take me longer than not only my official word limit but also that of my vocabulary. For how can one express three days worth of experiences into a short spiel, when, lets face it, who knows how many of you are going to read this anyways; for if you cared, you were there and if you cared and couldn't make it you are too busy hating me for being there right now to lend your eyes and time to listen to me gloat of my experiences. Therefore, rather than wax a lyrical slick of verbal diarrhea upon your good persons (rude and officious to say the least) I present to you the inaugural (and if Matt reads this possibly last), The Dwarf Falls Festival (Marion Bay edition) Awards ™©®

The Prologue – The Event

As with any awards ceremony, along with the frilly dresses, escort service dates and copious amounts of sponsor swag, a little bit of back story regarding why we are all here always gives rise to a sense of occasion and of course allows me (your compare, judge, jury and executioner) a chance to metaphorically straighten her tie, fill her glass and figuratively crack her knuckles to the task at hand.

Ok, Falls, a phenomenon, a folk legend and a festival in a farm in the wilds of Marion Bay. This here is God's country (whether you believe in such an entity or not, go with me on the analogy, you will feel better for it) nestled amongst the sand and sea is a little nirvana, replete with two stages, a market, a village and about 14 500 very happy little punters all angling for a corker new years eve. And by golly don't the good people at the Falls Festival deliver! Not only did Falls Festival boast an incredible line up of incendiary and varying acts, they also delivered, in this punter's mind, one of the most efficiently and ecologically friendly events I have ever had the chance to attend. From the drop dunnies (and yes you did get used to them after a while, although the lack of running water in them did give rise to some ‘performance anxieties' in some) to the separate garbage bags for recycling and actual rubbish, the good people at Falls can indeed be patted on the back for actually instilling a event with a conscience and actually treating the land on which they were rocking upon with the respect it deserved. Kudos!

Moreover, never have I come across more helpful, friendly and courteous people! From the bar staff who were always ready with a smile when they cracked my beer, to the collectors who took said beer cans away when I had done with them, to the food and beverage people who lovingly crafted my kebabs, fuck even the punters who pushed past me in the pit said ‘excuse me' and ‘thank you'. I mean it might be the tourist coming out in me, but you just don't get that in Melbourne.

Ok, so we have established the following, Falls is a great festival, incredibly well run, with an environmental awareness and punters and staff that make you feel welcome and loved. Which is exactly the reason people go to festivals in the first place. Yes, there is the music, granted, that is a big draw card; but what really draws people to festivals is the sense of community they generate, the feeling one has to belonging to something much bigger than themselves, the opportunity to reach out and tell a stranger, any stranger, perhaps even one that is backing away from you with fear radiating from every pore on their body, that they are loved (ok, maybe that was just me doing that). And in our capitalist hurly burly of a society where we are too often deprived of the fraternity that only other actual human beings (as opposed to MySpace page hits) can provide, the Falls provides a shining example of what utopia can be like (although my utopia would have flushable toilets, showers and an abundance of Johnny Depp look-alikes but this is a minor quibble)

But lets get down to the nitty gritty, the music, as much as all this philanthropic talk of peace love and community is filling my heart with joy at the world around me, I feel that I am probably losing some of you here so….

DRUMROLL………

The envelopes if you will….

THE AWARDS

Category: Music with a message

Winner : Saul Williams

Ok, so I am an unabashed rock chick, generally speaking, unless its in strict four/four time and has a riff, I generally don't get it. So when I found myself at the field stage trying to find my best friend and Saul Williams came on, I was expecting to bid a hasty retreat out of there and back to what I knew. Nevertheless, when Saul Williams came on stage I was transfixed; bolted to my spot (although now sitting in an attempt to show some courtesy to my fellow punters) by his words, his wisdom and his indefatigable spirit. It would be useless of me to try and define his style for it took in so many genres; moving from hip-hop to drum and bass to funk to dance to rock and electronica, that the combined new buzz word to describe it would take far too many syllables and would be completely unpronounceable and all who would attempt it would need a cup of tea, a Bex and a good lie down after doing so. All I can say is that if Saul Williams does us the honour of gracing our fair shores again, see him, do not question it, just do it.

Honourable Mentions:

John Butler Trio: Many thought that the mighty JBT would take out this category and I did too until I saw Saul Williams. That is not to say that JBT were not awesome, for they were. I usually find all that hippy love one another stuff a little off-putting, but despite however one connects (or doesn't) with the themes inherent in their work what absolutely stands out is the connectivity JBT has with the music itself. Not only do they manage to make three people sound like a veritable wall of sound, the dexterity and intricacy of the music is not lost within it, an incredible feat by one of this countries shining lights in roots music.

Blue King Brown: BKB play music that in general, isn't my cup of tea, I don't know why, it just isn't. Having said that, they played an incredible set. What made it great was not only the energy inherent on stage but how they transferred it to the audience, managing not only to get the front rows dancing but also a Mexican wave to even go to the back tent, which on a 4pm slot, is no small achievement. BKB are definitely a band to watch out for

Michael Franti: What a way to see in the new year! Again, Michael Franti is not an artist I generally get into, however, Michael Franti set the peace, love and harmony vibe high to bring in 2007 and lets face it 2006 was a little lacking in all three so this is, if nothing else, a damn good insurance policy for the year to come. For a band and style of music that doesn't float my boat, not only did I strain my voice screaming I also bruised my palms clapping; you should see the injuries I get from bands I really like.

RAWWWK!!!! Aussie Stylee

Winner: Three way tie, You Am I, The Vasco Era, Eskimo Joe

You Am I: The Marion Bay set was touted as YAI's comeback to the Falls Festival stage, where they were to seek redemption for 2004's much publicized fracas. But in my eyes (and considering I wasn't there my eyes are more forgiving than most) no redemption needed to be sought as the fact of the matter is that not only do we crave our rock stars to act like fucking rock stars on occasion (Chris Martin, take note, that humanitarian shtick is wearing fucking thin on me) we need it. So in actuality YAI crucified themselves on stage in 2004 for our redemption, for our bloodlust, for our alcohol induced adolescent fantasies and for that, we should be truly thankful. Oh that and I think Tim Rogers is God, so the metaphor fits quite nicely. But the truth of the matter (religious iconography and sacrilege aside) is that when YAI are good, there is no body better. Not only has Tim Rogers penned some of the finest tunes ever strummed in this country but these tunes have become the hallmarks of the identities of so many growing up during the 1990's and the quality continues to this very day. Live, there are few that can match the energy, the alacrity or the effusiveness of YAI and since Tim Rogers has gotten into the habit of taking his shirt off for the last few tunes during recent shows, this is a band that can seriously do no wrong. And if any of you have a problem with that, I'll see you in the car park later.

The Vasco Era: Why these guys are not absolutely huge yet and Wolfmother are is fucking beyond me. They have irascible energy on stage, rocking tunes and when Sid O'Neil screams ‘Sweeeeeeet little honey bee' my knees go weak. Enough said.

Eskimo Joe: One of those bands that I have never seen live but seem to know all the words too (well mostly, I think I was getting a number of them wrong, but mindless humming in those spots covered the gaffe nicely). I now can see what all the fuss is about; don't get me wrong, I always knew they could write a great song, but I had never fallen over myself to buy an album or see the guys live. Not only was their set one of the highlights of my Falls for their sheer ‘We are just happy to be here-ness' and of course the requisite huge crowd reaction but it was also proven to me, beyond a shadow of a doubt that no one pulls of a long white coat quite like Kav Temperley.

Honourable Mentions

Little Birdy: Bright red stilettos and gold lame jackets; no one does charisma, pout and rock star savvy quite like Katy Steele and nor should they try.

Wolf and Cub: For not only pushing the bounds of percussion but also due to the fact that not only did these boys play both Falls festivals, but they also played the Espy NYE and Beats on the Beach on the first, a living testament that it's a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll!

Dishonorable Mention: Wolfmother

Ok, so I might be just a tad too attached to my old Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin and Deep Purple albums here, but I just don't get it. I know I am sparking a generational debate here and quite possibly falling into the remaining divide, but for me, Wolfmother are providing nothing new. For me, the band just didn't spark on the night, although to be fair, the kids were certainly getting into it. One thing I will say about Wolfmother, is that if you are going to go through your parents record collection for ‘inspiration' at least they had the nous to pick the good albums. Heaven knows what they would be like if they had found the Bay City Rollers ones.

RAWWWWK!!!! International Stylee

No winners, but Honourable Mentions : Modest Mouse, The Bees, The Mountain Goats.

Not meaning any disrespect to our international visitors as not only did they provide great sets, and I had my ass shaking considerably to The Bees, but if their inclusion reminds us of anything is it that we have such a breadth of talent in this country that stands up to international standards. In short, Aussie bands fucking rock.

And now for something a little different…

Winner : Ground Components

I don't quite know what it is about Ground Components which I adore quite so much. I have had ‘On Your Living Room Floor' on almost constant rotation on my iPod since I got their album An Eye For A Brow, A Tooth For A Pick. Live, they have a charisma that is indescribable, all I can say is if you get the chance to see them, don't question it, just do it.

Honourable Mentions:

Fourplay: Anyone that can do a classical version of the Beastie Boys ‘Sabotage' not only has my respect, but they can have my vote at the next election as well.

Unleash the Nugget: Nothing is harder than opening a festival on the first day. Unleash the Nugget did so not only with a positive vibe but with aplomb… good work lads.

And the bands who are not mentioned above, please do not take it personally, as I do not as yet have a clone (and if I did I wouldn't be sending them to festivals, rather I would have them in the Dwarf office doing the shit jobs that I hate doing), scheduling clashes and my overwhelming need for sleep after the stroke of midnight (yes, I am old) made it impossible to see every act on the bill. As I metaphorically ruffle your hair know that I am sure that you were great out there.

As with all awards nights, a few thank you's are in order… scroll through them quickly so you can pretend that you are watching a live telecast.

Big thanks have to go to a few people for making this happen, firstly to my best friend Bronya for her tent savvy, hugs, support and spending new years with me (I can be a trial at times, especially in airport queues). To Shannon Keays who got my shit together for me on both days and for all round sweetness, sunshine and light in the lead up to the event on the days themselves. To the remarkable J.B. who drove us back to where we had to get our tickets and got out bus to wait for us with our luggage so we wouldn't get caught out; I owe you at least a carton of your preferred beverage and my heartfelt thanks. And a thank you to the nameless punter who bent our tent pole back to straightness after it was bent awry by the Marion Bay winds (or another pissed punter, we don't actually know); we had somewhere to sleep without fear of being smothered thanks to you. And of course a big thanks has to go to my boss Matt for letting me have a much needed and much appreciated holiday oh and for picking us up at the airport, because nothing says love like an airport run, I do airport runs for nobody.

And in finishing I would like to thank our sponsors: Cascade Draught, for being such a tasty beverage, Swissness baby wipes, for giving us that ‘almost had a shower' clean, to Virgin Blue for not losing our bags and of course not crashing, and last but by no means least Hobart water for keeping us hydrated in such a refreshing way.

Until next year, that was The Dwarf Falls Festival (Marion Bay edition) Awards ™©®

Thank you, good night!